October 2026 — 3 min read
What Should I Do With My Life? Start Here
You don't need to know what you want to do with your life before you start. Almost nobody does. Figure out the next step you can see, take it, and keep doing that. The bigger reasons usually show up once you're already moving, not before you're allowed to begin.
I didn't know what the money was for
I started working on a farm in Bountiful, Utah, when I was twelve. I had no life plan. I wanted money, and I couldn't have told you what for. Video games, food, renting movies.
At fourteen I heard that a family member hung drywall and sometimes needed help, so I asked. I made twelve dollars an hour cleaning up job sites. At fifteen I got a job at Carl's Jr. When my cousin got hired at a McDonald's for a dollar more an hour, I applied there too. Later I found a job on a new website called Indeed: baking rolls in Salt Lake City from three in the morning until eleven, because it paid more.
None of that was a plan. Every move was the same move: I heard about something a little better, I asked for it, and I took it.
I didn't really have a plan until well into my twenties, and even then it changed every couple of years. What I did have the whole time was a willingness to figure out the next step. Not the next ten. Just the next one.
Stop waiting for the plan
Nobody is going to hand you a plan for your life. Not your parents, your boss, or your smartest friend. That isn't because nobody cares about you. A plan for your life just isn't something anyone else can give you.
A lot of people get stuck right there. They wait to feel sure. They wait for someone to notice them, or for the moment it all becomes clear.
Waiting feels responsible, but most of the time it just puts your life on somebody else's calendar. It doesn't become clear on its own. You make it clear by moving.
Take the next row
On that farm, there was a ladder nobody talked about. You started on radishes. If you worked hard, they moved you up to eggplant. I never asked for eggplant. One day the owners came and got me because of how I'd been working the other rows.
That's how figuring it out actually works:
- Work the row you're in. Do your current thing well enough that people notice.
- Look for the better row. Is there a version of what you're doing that pays more, teaches more, or gets you closer to something you're curious about?
- Ask for it. Out loud. Most people hope to be chosen. Asking puts you ahead of almost everyone.
Do that enough times and you'll know a lot more about what you want than you would from thinking about it.
What the research says
Passions are usually built, not found. In a 2018 study, psychologists Paul O'Keefe, Carol Dweck and Gregory Walton found that people who believe interests are fixed, something you discover, were more likely to lose interest in a topic once it got difficult, as if it hadn't really been their passion after all. People who believe interests develop over time stayed interested through the hard part. (O'Keefe, Dweck & Walton, 2018)
If you're waiting to find the one thing you're meant to do, you may be waiting for something that only shows up after you've put in the work.
This week
- Write down what you've been waiting for. A sign, a promotion, someone's approval, feeling ready. Be specific.
- Ask for one thing you've been assuming you'd have to earn or wait for: a conversation, an introduction, a shot at something bigger.
- Find your better row. Look at what you're doing now and find one version of it that's a step up. Don't decide yet. Just go look at it.
Questions people also ask
- Is it normal to not know what to do with your life?
- Yes, at any age. Most people who look certain figured it out one step at a time and only explained it as a plan afterward.
- How do I figure out what I want to do with my life?
- Stop trying to answer the whole question at once. Pick the next step you can see that pays more, teaches more, or gets you a little closer to something you're curious about, and take it. Clarity comes from moving.
- What if I don't have a passion?
- Most people don't start with one. Research suggests passions are usually developed through effort, not found fully formed. If you wait to feel passionate before you start, you may wait a long time.
- Should I wait until I'm sure before making a change?
- Usually no. Waiting feels responsible, but it often means handing your timeline to someone else. Take a small step you can undo and learn from it.
- What if I pick the wrong thing?
- You'll learn faster from the wrong thing than from standing still. Every move teaches you something about what you want and what you don't.
- What should I do with my life?
- Nobody can answer that for you, and you don't have to answer it all at once. Find the next step you can see, the row that pays a little more or teaches a little more, and take it. The bigger answer shows up while you're moving.
- What am I doing with my life?
- If you're asking, you've noticed the plan you're living isn't one you chose. That's not a crisis, it's the first honest look. Start with one thing you're curious about and one small step toward it this week.